Developing an assertive approach in practice
"Assertiveness is a choice," said Carolyne Crowe at London Vet Show.
Carolyne Crowe, veterinary coach and mentor, took delegates at the London Vet Show through what assertiveness is and what it isn't. "If what you are doing over and over isn't working, maybe it is time to do something different," she began.
It is important to think about what is driving us forward and to overcome the things that are stopping us from achieving our goals. To help do this, it may be useful to draw an 8-segmented 'wheel' that covers key segments of your personal life or your relationships or aspects of your work, for instance. Each segment can be scored on a scale of 1 to 10 and by joining the dots it is possible to create you own personal wheel of "where you are now".
Assertiveness means being honest with yourself and others. It is about knowing your mindset, communicating it confidently and facilitating the process of moving on. There is also a need to select the appropriate time and situation in which to be assertive. In order to do this we have to make ourselves aware of the motivation and communication styles of the people with whom we work.
Carolyne stressed the importance of not being driven by our emotions when we are communicating in the work environment. The correct use of assertiveness will often prevent us from straying into this emotional territory.
It is important to be able to recognise people who are either 'over-assertive' or 'submissive' so that you can better employ your own balanced assertiveness and communicate in a constructive way to achieve an 'I'm OK, You're OK' outcome.
Concluding her presentation, Carolyne reminded delegates that "assertiveness is a choice" and that there is nothing wrong with being "responsibly selfish".
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